A Letter to Myself at Thirteen

Hi you.

I know things are crazy right now, but they do get better. I know you’re trying to find your place in this world, and honestly this is something I’m still struggling with, but I think it’s going to be okay. I have faith everything will work out. Hopefully.

First and foremost, listen to mom. She may be annoying now, but there is a reason why she doesn’t want you dating. There is a reason why she yells at you when you’re being a brat. Please treat her with respect. She is one of the best people you will ever have in your life and you must cherish her. Stop being so angsty. You will need to be her rock in the future, so learn from her strength now and try to be the best daughter you can. She thinks the world of you. Nothing you can do can change that, and trust me, at twenty, you’ve given her plenty of reasons to disown you.

Secondly, be nice to your friends, and most importantly Elizabeth. You don’t know it yet, but she will become the only friend you keep in constant contact with as you grow up and head off to college. She is such a special human; she did not deserve to be bullied when we were younger. No one does. You not stepping up to defend her was just as bad as bullying her yourself.

Be a good role model for your brother even when he drives you crazy and you actually want to kill him. You don’t know how much you mean to him.

Stay on top of your grades; you really need to start taking studying seriously. College is a whole other ballgame and you’re not quite as smart as you think you are.

Be silly. Be honest. Be kind. Be unapologetically you. Stay true to the person you have always been, please please please do not feel pressured to change the amazing human being that you are. You will one day find people who adore you just for being your sarcastic, blunt and happy self. It gets better.

PSA: I know you all may have had many different experiences at thirteen, but this is mine. All of our experiences have shaped us into the lovely people that we are today. We are who we are for a reason. Whether you can relate to my letter or not, it is nice to be able to reflect on the past and see where we could have done something differently or see how that shitty situation actually helped us learn something that we couldn’t have picked up any other way (i.e. like not staying in a relationship with an older boy who has cheated on you, even if you think he is “the one”. Plot twist, he wasn’t). The bottom line is here is that we all had something to learn from our thirteen year old selves. Whether it was not staying with crappy guys, too much eyeliner doesn’t look good on your facial structure, or maybe your mom really does know what she is talking about, it all transformed us in some way. It’s what makes us us at the end of the day. And we are awesome.

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